4 Types of Affairs

We see affairs all over the media. In the tabloids, our favorite tv shows, popular movies. However, only about 21% of married men and 14% of married women have affairs. During the last 20 years these percentages have stayed around the same point. The reason why we see so much of affairs is because it creates good drama! And drama is entertaining.

There are four types of affairs. Some people may not even consider some of these types affairs. Most of the time when we think of someone having an affair it means that that person slept with someone other than their spouse. This is only one type of an affair. 

Here are the four types:

1. Fantasy

2. Visual

3. Romantic

4. Sexual

Fantasy affairs are emotionally detached. An example of this would be flirting with someone online. Maybe an old flame from the past. Even fantasizing about someone romantically who isn't your spouse. So for all you married people stop fantasizing about Channing Tatum no matter how chiseled his face is! 

Visual affairs are physically detached. The most common form of this affair is pornography. Recently, Cosmopolitan came out with an article titled 8 Reasons Porn Does Not Make Him a Cheater. This is false! Pornography is destroying! Is destroys a person on so many levels! The effects of pornography are objectification, overemphasis on the visual, overemphasis and desensitization of sec and instant gratification and instant solutions. Pornography is not real! It not only hurts the person who views it but it hurts their loved ones-spouse, children, and friends. 

The third type of affairs is a romantic affair. This is emotionally attached. This can happen between two coworkers as they drive together to places and talk about personal things. They begin to become attached to the other person and that attachment can lead to inappropriate feelings. That is why it is so important for married couples to never be alone with someone of the opposite sex. Wether it's a work lunch, carpooling, or just getting together with an old friend. As people share their values and aspirations it can lead to feelings of attachment to that words on where the only person a married person should be attached to is their spouse. 

The last type of affairs is sexual. This is physically attached. This is the affair that we all think of first. 

If someone does have an affair their is hope. The couple TOGETHER can get help from marriage and family therapists or ecclesiastical leaders. I stress the together part because if an individual goes to a therapist then the spouse will feel threatened and those relationships are more likely to end in divorce than those who don't get any help. All things should be done is the companionship. Most couples who choose to work through these problems together come out of it having a stronger marriage than before. Marriage and family is so important that we must do all we can to help families stay together.